For many people, planning a wedding is exciting and wonderful. It’s a chance to express your personality, celebrate with your friends and family, and mark your commitment as you start a journey with the person you love. I’m participating as a vendor this weekend at the Time For Weddings Show in Fredericton, NB.
As I learn more and make more lingerie with a focus on comfort and fit, I realize just how uncomfortable many of us are on our wedding day. Even though my wedding was low key, outdoor, and informal, I consciously made an extra effort to choose my attire so that I’d be comfortable. I somewhat succeeded, but could have done better!
There was a lot of uncertainty surrounding my body and what it would look like at my wedding. I was planning my wedding during my pregnancy – my daughter was 4 months old at the wedding, and I was breastfeeding – so I took a few precautions.
My dress was not a traditional one. I ordered extra fabric and added straps, since I was already large breasted and knew that they’d likely be larger again. I knew I wouldn’t be comfortable in a strapless dress all day, since I’ve never liked that style. I also chose a lightweight fabric because chances were that it would be hot (and I was right.) I purchased the dress when I was five months pregnant, figuring I’d be around the same size when the wedding came around, which was largely true – but my body was a different shape. Luckily an empire waist covers a lot.
My underwear was a different struggle. I had difficulty finding a bra to wear under the dress in my size (which, at the time, was fluctuating between 30 H-J) that fit at all, let alone was comfortable. I ended up in a moulded foam cup bra that was extremely hot. Foam combined with 30 C temperatures, sunshine, and breast milk production meant I was sticky. Extremely sticky.
Based on my own experience and the knowledge I’ve gathered since 2010, I’m offering the following advice to folks out shopping and planning for their own wedding underwear. Here are some things to think about:
- Level of support. Can you go confidently and comfortably without a bra? Are you able to wear stick on bras? Do you need foam cups, extra lift? These are important to consider BEFORE you fall in love with a dress. You want to be enjoying your big day, not tugging on your dress or suit, worrying about poking nipples, or flashing all your guests!
- Set a budget for your underwear! You may need two sets – one for under your dress or suit, and one for the wedding night. The wrong underwear can make your perfect outfit look less than ideal. Good quality underwear is not cheap, but you should be able to wear it again. Wedding night underwear, however…that’s the kind that you buy for someone else to take off, and you aren’t likely to be, ahem, wearing it for long.
- Know how a good fitting bra is supposed to look and feel! The band should be snug and carrying all the weight of your breasts. The wire should follow the curve and sit exactly where your breast meets your chest. The bridge (that bit in the centre, between the cups) should be flat against your chest. And that’s just the start!
- Get properly measured and fitted at a store that carries your size. If you are wearing a DD cup, chances are you are NOT actually a DD – that just happens to be the largest cup size that many retail stores carry. I’m also happy to do a fitting for you so you are armed with good information to go shopping.
- Weight loss. If you are planning to lose considerable weight before your wedding, it may drastically affect the fit of your bra in particular. However, if you leave shopping for underwear until the last minute, you may not end up with what you need. For custom underwear, you’ll need to begin at least 8 weeks in advance. Small alterations can be done closer to the date, but you are running a risk. Plan on hitting your weight goal well in advance of your wedding if you are considering custom lingerie.
- Take pictures of your wedding clothing with you when you are underwear shopping. If you’re getting custom made underwear, take the dress/suit if possible. Same goes when you’re altering your outfit- wear your underwear that you plan on wearing when you get it altered. BE SURE TO STAND UP AND SIT DOWN. This changes how the clothes and underwear sit, and may make a huge difference to your comfort. Image being too uncomfortable to sit down for your entire wedding day!
- Comfort. Choose your undergarments for maximizing comfort during the wedding. Getting married on a hot day? Think about how you feel in a normal dress or suit on a hot day. Do you get hot and sticky thighs? Maybe a pair of long lingerie shorts will help with that. Do foam cups create swimming pools of sweat under your breasts? Is that going to show if you end up ditching your jacket? Consider a well-constructed, seamed bra that breathes better.
- Enhancement (and I don’t mean cleavage.) What about underwear options that may add to your wedding attire? Instead of trying to hide straps, why not choose ones that are beautifully accented with lace or fabric that add to, instead of detract from, your outfit. Have a fantastic tattoo? Show it off!
For me, the ideal type of underwear, like shoes, is the kind that you absolutely forget that you’re wearing. Get in touch if you’d like to learn more about how Queen of Cups can help make your wedding day extra special!